Eating Your Pride is Unheatlhy

2016 

I learned a thing that I could never forget.

I learned to put off my pride.

I learned that if you really want something, make some noises.

I learned to ask.

For most people, ‘asking’ might be a simple daily thing to do. But not me. My pride has been here and there for a crazy long time. It often hold me back to ‘ask’. I hate gambling. I avoid unpredictable situation. I loathe rejection. But this time, I realized that this thing has a massive urge which made me ran over the pride. I was not quite care what was the result. My only objective was only to let it out so I won’t curse myself one day if I did not.

Taking off the pride was such a horribly hard deal. I even caught my self practicing in front of the mirror for several times just to make sure I chose the right diction, proper situation, and casual expression. Oh Lord, I swear that was tough :’)

Finally the moment came. I left my pride on the drawer at home and went out. At last, I made it! I asked. I was so proud of myself for getting over it. So happy and so relieved even the answer did not even matter as much.

At night, I sometimes look back at that day and tell my self, “Wow I was really brave!” Then another thought crossed my mind, “The moment must be really important for me so that I conciously risk many things. My pride, my satisfaction, my story, and my feelings. If only the main object knew..”

But you know what? It’s all worth it! Thank you Wanda for being a big brave gurrlll 😀

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